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Becks

to see through a glass darkly

to see through a glass darkly


waking to another evening

so sure that sleep would end me

these walls leak memories like ink

through a silkscreen.

i focus on remembering

how to breathe, the last thing i ate,

and having babies.

as i search my eyes

for the girl who is stuck

behind the irises, and has been

since 2014. i wonder how she'd feel

about the things she doesn't even know

are happening, and if she'd recognise me

if we passed on the street.


“tell me again about that thing i said?”

“how many hours until i’m with him again?”


its a little too much to be all fucked up

with only her to see it.

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